tom haverford: *loses donna meagle in a crowded mall* man i was hoping it wouldn’t have to come to this
tom: *shouting* someone rear-ended a mercedes-benz in the parking lot!
donna: *pushing her way through the crowd* who the HELL do i have to fIGHT?
“i saw this shit coming and i still did nothing about it” - the story of my life
Keanu Reeves is a vampire.

Now, look at this:

That’s “Paul Mounet”, a french actor, who “died” in 1922.
His body never was found.
Then, look at this:

An unknown man, painted in 1530 by Parmigianino.
Compare them:


He’s a motherfucking vampire
His beard in 2011 even grows the same way as the painting in 1530

I totally believe this to be true.
- me: emotionally belts out "On My Own" in the shower pretending the water is rain and I am Eponine.
- me: i'll give you two dollars
- college: .........tuition is $39,000
- me: you're good. 2.50
